A dazzling collection of short fiction, containing stories published in New Writing and the TLS, as well as several new stories. The Novella 'I Like being Killed' takes the lid off the comedy scene in London, investigates where jokes come from and how you can make people laugh with only one toothpick and a foreskin. Other stories visit Brixton prison and German bookshops, contemplate the tanning of Russian bottoms on the Côte d'Azur, offer advice on driving during Romanian revolutions, explain what to do with fifty uselessnesses, give tips on successful and painless serial killing and demonstrate conclusively that no-one should live in South London.